Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Weight Issues

I'm going to make my first weight complaint blog here. And I know for some of you, you will be sick after reading it because it's pretty pathetic. But bear with me here.

Ok here's the story. So I've never really had much of a weight issue. I think through high school I weighed about 135. Which for my height was on the higher end of "normal." Then in the last 3 months of high school my weight catapulted to 170. At that point I was definitely "over-weight." But it didn't last long, even though it wasn't taken care of properly. I just quit eating until I was down to about 120. It took about 18 months before I realized I was pretty much as small as I would get, and decided to start eating normal portions again. Then I leveled out at about 135-140. I think that's just what my body was made to weigh.

At the beginning of my pregnancy I weighed 142. At the end of my pregnancy I weighed 177. Within a few months, I was back down to my 140. Right where I should have been. But THEN we ran into the issues with Molly's allergies, and I quit eating all of those foods and quickly dropped to 120. Molly was weaned the day before Thanksgiving, when I just couldn't fight the temptation anymore and really wanted to eat some cake or pie or something like that. (Gosh, I'd really expect myself to remember that better after 6 months of not eating the "good" stuff.) I expected myself to dig right into Thanksgiving and Christmas foods and be back to my 140 in no time. And all the time of losing weight because of Molly's allergies I kept holding off buying too many new clothes because I knew it was only temporary. So I just kept drowning in my size 8's.

But here I am now, two months later, eating a ton, and not healthily as often as possible (in hopes of getting where I should be sooner) and I've only gained 3 pounds. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? I'm terribly nervous still to go spend a bunch of money on a whole new wardrobe, but Lord knows I need to. I just know a month after I do, I'll either put back on my 20 pounds or else end up pregnant again.

What to do? What to do?

PS...yes I realize some people would give a left kidney to have this weight problem...but it's real to me. (And probably the worst part is that I can't even fill an A cup any more...which means in a year's time I went from a D (sure I was nursing, but still) to an A-. Ridiculous!

(OK now I'm done complaining!)

1 comment:

Sarah :) said...

Well you're right, I am a little sick. But just a LITTLE. *hehe*

I understand how frustrated you must be and that this is a real and actual struggle, just as real to you as my struggles are to me (except in the opposite direction.) I feel for ya, I really do.

Have you seen a doctor about it? I mean, they might be able to pinpoint what it is, whether it be hormonal or whatever.

ALSO, I wouldn't run out and buy a whole new wardrobe but it probably wouldn't hurt to get you a few new pieces that fit. I know I've slumped around in clothes that didn't fit just waiting to LOSE weight and in the meantime look like an absolute slob for loooong periods of time. And as they say on What Not To Wear, "Dress the body you're IN!" Besides, maybe it'll break your "jinx" and you'll start gaining weight! *haha*

P.S. Thanks for the nice comment you left on my blog! I'm glad we're fellow bloggers, too. :)